While Red Lodge’s glacial location tends to be a policing force in the area of skin exposure, summer is on its way and your own good sense is going to have to take over where Mother Nature and her arctic conditions left off.
Now, I know none of you dress in a way that makes people whisper, giggle or wince when you walk by. You simply wouldn’t do that; you have too much class to sacrifice your style and self-worth in the name of sex appeal. So, since none of you need this column, let’s talk about all those people who do!
What we say as she walks by: “Wow honey! The invitation was for you and a guest. Not you and “the girls” out for a night.”
What we wish we could tell her: Unless you are going for a job interview in Wells Nevada, cleavage should not be the center of your show. If you are looking to be a stylish woman, having all the merchandise out on display is a clear, no. No matter how brilliant, serious and forthright you are, the general population is going to have a really hard time taking you seriously.
What we say: “Did you see her? That dress must have been painted on! I mean there is fitted and there is Jello bound in saran wrap!”
What we wish we could tell her: Well, honestly we want to tell her about the Jello and saran wrap comment. Honestly, if that won’t give someone cause for reflection, nothing will.
What we say as she walks by: “Has she never heard of leaving something to the imagination?”
What we wish we could tell her: Skin is to an outfit what wine is to a good meal; a little enhances and a lot ruins (and leaves you in regret afterwards). Not all skin is created equal. Its location on the body and the body on which it is located makes all the difference. What I am going to say next is going to sting, so if you are thin skinned (no pun intended) skip to the *.
If you got it, flaunt it (tastefully), if you don’t, PUT IT AWAY! Not everyone is meant to wear ultra low rise jeans, cropped shirts, mini skirts and snuggly little cashmere sweaters. There is nothing sexy about doing a plumbers impression every time you even slightly bend over. Nothing sexy about a midsection that jiggles when you move. Nothing sexy about legs that look like cottage cheese. Nothing sexy about arms that swing. Nothing sexy about things rolling around under a thin fabric. This is not bashing, it is simply a statement of fact. If you are, in truth, concerned with how you look, you need to admit to yourself where you are in life and what looks good and what does not. Here is the biggest thing – You are not merely how you look! Your worth comes from a far broader spectrum. Having breasts does not make you a woman and having them running the show does not make you sexy.
*For a guy’s perspective, I conducted an informal survey of my male friends via text message (very scientific). Below are their comments which have only been edited for spelling. Names have been withheld to protect the innocent (such as they are).
Skin is great… for the first 10 seconds
Well, like most guys, a scantily clad good looking girl will catch my eye. But that’s about all they do.
Looks will only get you so far…and eventually they change
… I wouldn’t want to run around with a girl that’s dressed like a semi professional prostitute. I briefly dated a stripper once a long time ago so I’ve been down that road.
After that…
One of the most important things is confidence. That makes or breaks sex appeal. The woman doesn’t have to be the supermodel type, but with confidence can sell herself as such.
Self sustainable/ independent, open minded, glass half full
I think we want a woman who looks good when she’s dressed up to go to town, we want to be proud of our sweetheart and show her off and I am sure women want to feel that way about themselves as well. Clothing certainly can affect self esteem in that regard. A recent girlfriend type person I ran around with had some scars from skin cancer surgery on her chest and back and she was very self conscious about what she wore. To me she was beautiful and I didn’t even notice them but she was aware, had great fashion sense, dressed very conservatively to cover them and always looked great.
So, how do you get sexy without crossing the line into trashy? A little common sense is a good place to start. Take your surroundings into account before you leave the house. Consider not only if you are going to be comfortable in what you are wearing, but if the people around you are going to be comfortable. If the V-neck sweater you are wearing is going to make your grandma cringe at dinner, have enough respect and courtesy to wear something else. Finally, pick a classy friend and enlist them to help you make decisions on outfits in question.
Keep in mind sexiness for every body type can be found in some very interesting places:
Now, I know none of you dress in a way that makes people whisper, giggle or wince when you walk by. You simply wouldn’t do that; you have too much class to sacrifice your style and self-worth in the name of sex appeal. So, since none of you need this column, let’s talk about all those people who do!
What we say as she walks by: “Wow honey! The invitation was for you and a guest. Not you and “the girls” out for a night.”
What we wish we could tell her: Unless you are going for a job interview in Wells Nevada, cleavage should not be the center of your show. If you are looking to be a stylish woman, having all the merchandise out on display is a clear, no. No matter how brilliant, serious and forthright you are, the general population is going to have a really hard time taking you seriously.
What we say: “Did you see her? That dress must have been painted on! I mean there is fitted and there is Jello bound in saran wrap!”
What we wish we could tell her: Well, honestly we want to tell her about the Jello and saran wrap comment. Honestly, if that won’t give someone cause for reflection, nothing will.
What we say as she walks by: “Has she never heard of leaving something to the imagination?”
What we wish we could tell her: Skin is to an outfit what wine is to a good meal; a little enhances and a lot ruins (and leaves you in regret afterwards). Not all skin is created equal. Its location on the body and the body on which it is located makes all the difference. What I am going to say next is going to sting, so if you are thin skinned (no pun intended) skip to the *.
If you got it, flaunt it (tastefully), if you don’t, PUT IT AWAY! Not everyone is meant to wear ultra low rise jeans, cropped shirts, mini skirts and snuggly little cashmere sweaters. There is nothing sexy about doing a plumbers impression every time you even slightly bend over. Nothing sexy about a midsection that jiggles when you move. Nothing sexy about legs that look like cottage cheese. Nothing sexy about arms that swing. Nothing sexy about things rolling around under a thin fabric. This is not bashing, it is simply a statement of fact. If you are, in truth, concerned with how you look, you need to admit to yourself where you are in life and what looks good and what does not. Here is the biggest thing – You are not merely how you look! Your worth comes from a far broader spectrum. Having breasts does not make you a woman and having them running the show does not make you sexy.
*For a guy’s perspective, I conducted an informal survey of my male friends via text message (very scientific). Below are their comments which have only been edited for spelling. Names have been withheld to protect the innocent (such as they are).
Skin is great… for the first 10 seconds
Well, like most guys, a scantily clad good looking girl will catch my eye. But that’s about all they do.
Looks will only get you so far…and eventually they change
… I wouldn’t want to run around with a girl that’s dressed like a semi professional prostitute. I briefly dated a stripper once a long time ago so I’ve been down that road.
After that…
One of the most important things is confidence. That makes or breaks sex appeal. The woman doesn’t have to be the supermodel type, but with confidence can sell herself as such.
Self sustainable/ independent, open minded, glass half full
I think we want a woman who looks good when she’s dressed up to go to town, we want to be proud of our sweetheart and show her off and I am sure women want to feel that way about themselves as well. Clothing certainly can affect self esteem in that regard. A recent girlfriend type person I ran around with had some scars from skin cancer surgery on her chest and back and she was very self conscious about what she wore. To me she was beautiful and I didn’t even notice them but she was aware, had great fashion sense, dressed very conservatively to cover them and always looked great.
So, how do you get sexy without crossing the line into trashy? A little common sense is a good place to start. Take your surroundings into account before you leave the house. Consider not only if you are going to be comfortable in what you are wearing, but if the people around you are going to be comfortable. If the V-neck sweater you are wearing is going to make your grandma cringe at dinner, have enough respect and courtesy to wear something else. Finally, pick a classy friend and enlist them to help you make decisions on outfits in question.
Keep in mind sexiness for every body type can be found in some very interesting places:
- A starched white shirt – a crisp white shirt can be a magic bullet when you are looking for effortless sex appeal.
- Good posture – Head up, shoulders back and a fearless stride will make any outfit fade into the background as you become the feature.
- Soft fabrics-there is just something inviting about a fabric that begs to be touched.
- Heels- with jeans, dresses or skirts, heels instantly add a feminine spice that is hard to ignore.
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