Quad Shot Adventures at Work!

Oh ladies and gents there is a bit of a shocker that has happen in the world of coffee, the big gulp straw! Oh yes, you know how you will hear about those urban tales of pop rock explosions, mentos coke bottle bombs, or the Icey headaches that never end? Well this little urban tale is TRUE!

Is this legal???

I know I will let you take a moment to just take it all in! I am so flippen excited! You see it happen to me today when I went to grab a quick coffee pick me up before work. You see I love me a triple to quad shot in the morning and this was just your ordinary day until the gal hands me over the most amazing creation ever!!!! Not only is it my massive 24 ounce , quad shot , but it has the bestest accessory item in the world the BIG GULP STRAW!!! Oh you have not a clue at the sheer excitement or the possibilities  at the options that this would be giving a girl like me. Of course it did give me a HUGE laugh at the idea of the legality of this situation. I mean is it really a good idea to give miss amber a quad shot equipped with a straw of this magnitude?

Well after getting over the initial shock that there is the option of getting a big gulp straw with ones coffee, and also the worry that I may have to pace myself with this little gem of fantabulousness! So after posting my excitement on Face book, and sending a picture to Miss Ryan of the gift of greatness. I then realized that there could be something to this. Also after sharing this awesome news with my UPS gal, who by the way was just as enamored with the big gulp accessory as I was, I came to the conclusion that there is going to be a real trend starting here.

No tough days here!

Think about it. Going to have a bit of a tough day ahead? Heck go get you a coffee with a Big Gulp straw! You can totally forgo the use of an IV if you have a Big Gulp straw! I mean folks between blogging, ordering, pricing, and steaming new merchandise the store is a hopping and well its only going to get better! I mean any time you need a Lil somethin somethin to move your booty at work grab you one of these little dandy's and you are sure to be more productive than a sweatshop with a deadline!

Enjoy Your's Today!

So there is my little gift to you for the day, if you are feeling a little sluggish you just go get you a coffee with a big gulp straw and all will be right in the land of la.

Attack of Receipt Machine

First I must warn you if you have or have had any heart issues please read with caution due to the sheer unbridled , unwarranted, full on attack via the Receipt Machine!

So here is how my Lil day has started. I was happily enjoying an amazing convo with one of my favorite gals here in town Kathy Robson and all was right in the land of La. Then when I went to ring up her sweet new belt etc. the Receipt Machine refused to print. So after fighting with it checking all the normal things, power, paper, horoscope, weather, you know the works it still wouldn't work! Kathy being the gem of a gal that she is didn't mind and so when she left I decided I was going to have a little discussion with the Receipt Machine.

Now it may amaze you but I do speak not only Double D, Rocki Gorman, Boulet, but printer/fax/phone as well! I know you are all soooooo impressed with my language skills you can stop clapping, oh you are all to kind, but really stop clapping its getting awkward.

It was during our discussion that the Receipt Machine all up and decides to go Loco! Seriously starts printing off a cryptic code and by will not stop folks it went through the rest of the paper! Oh and as if that wasn't enough it up and went even more crazy and when I refilled it the crazy thing went right back to the Tales from the Crypt code printing again! I mean what the ficus?

So as you can imagine I instantly thought oh great now not only do I get attacked by cross's , ladders, and crazy cowhides, but Receipt Machines have it out for me as well! And I don't know about you but I am starting to get a little paranoid! I mean not to be all sorts of superstitious about it but, one does start to get a bit of a complex when inanimate objects are going out of their way to get you!

I mean what would you think? Not to mention I swear the rodeo poster all framed and hanging up behind me is well a wee bit intimidating, and one must wonder if the flowers on the Vogt case are going to just jump and get me during a dusting session! The possibilities are quite endless on the dangers in this little store! Not to mention add the fact that a bank robbery went all sorts of wrong in this building and one can only imagine that the culprits could very well want to go all sorts of poltergeist on me! Oh and after this sweet I am going to go all sorts of crazy on you, the dang machine again decided that it would not listen and print what I want but oh it will go head on into printing all that cryptic code, which I honestly believe is not saying I am everly so pretty!

If you are thinking that you haven't seen any post's on Facebook from Miss Amber for hours please come to the store just to make sure that I am alive and not being pinned down by one of the dangerous items that surround me!

Ya won't print a receipt heck no but I will print cryptic I am not your besti code!

See really like I speak evil!

It looks benign as all get out , but evil lurks inside!

It wouldn't stop printing!

Not even a little bit amused or impressed!

Buy this it is in a frame and I am frightened of it jumping down on me! Its yours for $50.00!

Special Moments and Memmories

You see after having Miss Ryan over for "A great you are back dinner" and her getting to survive a dinner with the wee ones, and having a great catch-up chat while Lil Dragon was a zombie, and died on the floor in front of us due to not wanting to eat all of his spaghetti before he got strawberries. Not to mention the on going commentary from ShelbyLee, Rori and Aubry it was quite funny to see that there are just well special moments that you only want to share with those that matter.

Any of you that has met Miss Ryan and Miss Amber know that these girls are well close, and also that they truly hold those that are in their lives close to their hearts. It is from little moments such as a good laugh over a crazy week spent with Twitch and the Kiddo's or a good catch up chat over wine with strawberries you are going to really see how down to earth these girls are.

It would surprise you all to learn that Miss Ryan is well one of the Emergency contacts for many of her friends with little one's, and she is also one of the first to be called if Miss Amber needs someone! She loves to cook, and can bake cookies that Miss Amber has been know to scarf down like a escapee from Fat Camp! She is also GREAT with little ones! Miss Amber's son has proclaimed that he will marry her on more than one occasion, and the girls just love the fact that they get Twitch as well as goodies from Miss Ryan often.

It would also surprise you to learn that tho Miss Amber speaks of her little one's often she is well a very private person when it comes to her babies, her home and only her dear friends are invited in to share her family. This is a shock to many who will often state Miss Amber is so fun and social, she is fun and social she just is also very protective of those she holds near and dear to her.

After the dinner with Miss Ryan, Miss Amber had to laugh at the fact that she well as always went into mommy mode and before she knew it she had served up Miss Ryan right along with the little ones! With out even thinking twice! You see Miss Amber is possessed by Martha Stewart in the kitchen and will often find herself just taking care of anyone that happens to be in the kitchen with her! Its just well how she rocks it, and thank goodness Miss Ryan just fell right in step with the program because bless her she didn't even think twice about the fact that she was handed her salad, dinner, and drink with silverware and napkin other than to bow her head when Miss Aubry lead the prayer for dinner.

It is moments like these that both girls are well proud of. They are genuine loving, caring, christian and family first kind of girls and you are able to see this both in their lives in and out of the store. So come and visit these two and get a chance to enjoy the difference in a store that is run and operated with down home values!

Cupcake's dang good and uber pretty too!

Why Of Course I will watch Twitch for you!

Okip here is the first thing you must do before sitting and reading, get your coffee, tea, a paper towel or napkin, and your phone to order Miss Amber a day at the Spa for when you are done reading.(thank you)

So as many of you are aware Miss Amber and Twitch are besties, and Miss Amber's lil munchi - chi's are all sorts of about Miss Ryan. So when given the chance to take care of Twitch while Miss Ryan vacationed to Oklahoma Miss Amber practically begged or well to be honest demanded Twitch stay with her.

This was all fine and dandy, and in the land of La this could have very well went as smooth as Fashion Week in New York minus the angry hungry models (hehehe I so crack myself up). Any hoo, Miss Amber was so convinced that the stay would be full of trips for lattes, and walks in the evening, followed by well a choir of angels  singing at bed time. Ya we know we don't know what Miss Amber was drinking but it must have been dang good for her to think for one single second that four children + Twitch would equal anything but Crazy!!

For those of you who have been lucky enough to meet the little darlings that Miss Amber has you are all at this point wiping up the beverage that just sprayed from your mouth and nose's when reading about the scenario that Miss Amber thought was going to happen. Its all good she TOTALLY backs y'all y'all up.

Now for those of you who have only heard little snippets here and there about the four little mites here is the run down description of them : ShelbyLee 13 who acts like she is 35 (has mind of evil scientist), Aubry 9 loving, bedazzling, and mischievous (often root cause of all evil plans), Rori 7 who loves singing and acting (often accompanies her actions with song), Aiden aka Lil Dragon perfect in all ways due to his brown eyes(Miss Ryan will back this up).

It was a great day in the neighborhood the evening that Twitch arrived. Miss Amber was playing domino's with Lil Dragon, the kids were all super excited for the furry visitor and I mean really what could go wrong? Ah Miss Amber bless her lil heart, if she could have only known what was to be her future!

Night one went with no bumps, and other than ShelbyLee and Lil Dragon fighting over who Twitch was to sleep with all was fantabulous. (poor naive girl) Miss Amber and Twitch got their Triple Shot and puppy treat and headed to the store. She took him home at lunch so he and his best friend Lil Dragon could chill, and actually went back to work all sorts of content and peaceful (silly silly girl)

Then it started. You see when Miss Amber is away the little ones will play and truth be told the little darlings are never going to be able to get away with a crime due to the fact that they like to not only document their liaisons with photos but also with song as well! Oh ya you see these are not your average children, not only do they have the capability of creating the most detailed plans of attack, but they are like a well oiled machine when it comes to following through with the plan.

So while Miss Amber was working at the store she started to receive a plethora of photos with captions! Oh ya that's right why just send a pic when you can narrate it with a caption? The first photo was of Twitch happily dressed in a lime green polo shirt, in the loving arms of Miss Rori, caption Doesn't he look hansom?

K so I get what you are thinking oh how cute, what sweet little darling children. Truth be told if that was the only photo Miss Amber would have thought the same. The next photo is of the darling Twitch sittin in his sweet polo like he wears clothes all the time! caption "Oh ya, that's just how he rolls" gotta love the ghetto commentary from miss ShelbyLee.

By the end of the work day though Miss Amber thought seriously about just hiding in the store for the evening she went home. What was awaiting her was a scene like nothing she had seen before! Through the door she walks and there she finds the house quiet! That's right the evil creature's  were nowhere to be seen and in all reality in any other family this would be right as rain but, in Miss Amber's years of experience this was a stage 4 on the Terrorist scale for emergency!

She ran through the house and found nothing! Then she noticed that the shoes of the lil mites they were a missing! She then went out on the deck and what do you think she found? That's right Lil Dragon and the 3 Musketeers were all running back and forth while wait for it, pushing Twitch in the Tonka truck! I mean why not schlep the dog back and forth and run like you are in a relay race in the Olympics? I mean heck whip lash Not an Issue, and who care's if we don't have our coats on (mind you the dog is dressed!) . After gathering up her best mean mommy voice and biting her lip so she wouldn't laugh out loud at the craziest relay race she has ever seen Miss Amber stated  " get the dog out of the dump truck, and get your little booty's in the house you are all going to catch a cold!"  Most children well they would listen...Miss Amber's chillens on the other hand well they way the odds, and all look to Miss Aubry to see what her take is on the tone in mommy's voice (she is often in trouble and so she knows when to listen and when to not) . And due to the fact that Miss Aubry didn't even stop pushing the Tonka truck or stop telling Rori to and I quote "Hurry Run Him to ShelbyLee, before she gets down the stairs!" You can just imagine the dismay, and well the need for a glass of wine Miss Amber felt at that moment.

Now folks here is the deal-i-oso , this i just one of over a thousand incidents that Miss Amber went through during the Twitch stay. In all honesty when she heard Osama was captured and killed she checked to see that all the children and the dog were to be accounted for.(they may be evil, but they are true Americans) So keep reading our blog and enjoy the next few months on the Twitchets page.

Just a normal day with Twitch

As you all are aware Twitch is well pretty flippen sweet, and quite frankly a true fixture in our store and lives. He gets asked for more than me or Miss Ryan, and pretty much thinks he runs the show. It is pretty bad when I am so excited to go to work and instead of "Oh Yay your here!" Its so where is Twitch?, or my favorite is the well we just came to see Twitch!

So due to his extreme popularity I have done what was needed and sat with our furry Lil friend and got the low down on the day in the life of Twitch. (your welcome)

MA: So how does your day normally start?

T: Well often I need to prep myself for a busy day, and since I have been blessed with natural good looks I don't have to do really anything. (must be nice!)

MA: Now when you are with me and the kiddos we normally get the kids, breakfast , and a talk to the President out of the way before 8. How does this go with Miss Ryan?

T: Well she is always doing something and I am constantly trying to brainstorm on new products, and displays for the store, not to mention we are always on the go so I do alot my thinking in the car and at the ranch.

MA: I see. So when it comes to the ranch how do you  do all you do?

T: Well beings how I am kind of a BIG DEAL at the ranch there is just no end of things that need to be done! From trying to train my cat, to debriefing the new colts, and even having to show the steers how to play the game of life! I am basically moving the entire time, and you know I am a perfectionist!

MA: You mentioned you have a cat? How does a dog obtain a pet cat? Is that even legal?

T: Oh yes, it is definitely legal. (pauses and yawns.) I basically just got him because no one else wanted him. He has been a bit tough to train but I find he makes a good effort, and I very seldom have any problems with him.

MA: As you know you have become quite famous here in the store , has fame gone to your head? How do you remain so grounded?

T: Oh you know me I like the simpler things in life, a good chew toy, lots of running space, and extravagant trips to coffee with Miss Amber, and car trips with Miss Ryan.

MA: Well Twitch it has been a pleasure!

Now Twitch after the interview not only did a photo shoot in the store with Miss Amber, but he then was off and running with Miss Ryan to the ranch. To say he is a multi talented for a canine is well just the tip of the iceberg when you get to know this cow dog.

Always a multi tasker Twitch during the interview checking the street traffic.

Twitch and his good friend Charlie

He not only is good at retrieving but also picking out boots!

Hello God It's Me Miss Amber

So here is the thing I pride myself on being a pretty sweet gal, nice, respectful, and genuine. Now saying this I must bring to you blog readers a rough lil situation in which either God is trying to tell me something, or Miss Ryan needs to hang things on the wall a little better.
You see here I was just minding my own lil business, filing the Boulet file (which means trying to match this with that) and enjoying the great song by Zac Brown and Alan Jackson "She's Walking Away"(feel free to send tickets for Miss Ryan and Miss Amber ;)

exhibit A : cross jumps!

What in the Ficus just happened?

And all of a sudden I am attacked by the cross hanging on the wall by the Boulet Boot Display! I kid you not, the cross jumped off the wall and landed on Ferdinand! Right by my desk I might add! What in the holy manolo blahniks is a girl to think! I mean come on people though I may be a little much for some (I am a lot like Chinese food either you love me, or you like fries, for those who like fries I kindly offer packs of ketchup) So for the unwarranted assault on Ferdinand and my nerves I was really wondering what in the world this was suppose to mean?

wall where it was hanging.(very suspicious I agree)

I mean really how many of you have been accosted by a cross? What? What did you say ? None of you? See what I mean this is either the work of our God from above, or Miss Ryan is not hanging things on the wall with sturdy enough nails. Now due to the fact that I have been in the Cowgirl School of Miss Ryan I really must say normally when that girl hangs something it doesn't budge!
I worked an entire year with 3 crosses hanging on the wall behind me and not once was I attacked! So you can imagine the shock when this cross just up and relocated itself! And you know i so would have been totally helpful if it had just said "Miss Amber here is the deal-i-oso, I would rather be on the other wall" I mean ladies and gents I would have been all over that idea like a group of Jenny Craig dieters in a Lil Debbie aisle!

You can buy this now available cross for your home $50.00!!!

After the initial shock of this situation had time to resonate in my little mind, and my heart was placed back in my chest I got the cross and kindly explained that it would love more than anything to live resting on the floor in the back til it was bought or til Miss Ryan came back.
I must say though the jokes that have been going through my head have been pretty great! Like "Ya God wanted my attention so he gave me a little sign!" or "I thought I was doing good but God thinks I need to carry the cross!" You see I am even positive when I get jumped by crosses! And once again this just totally re-iterates the fact that working retail is dangerous!
Seriously you name one job that you can have the following incidents: ladder failures, cowhide attacks, angry dress form attacks, and last and certainly not the least Cross attacks! Now I know some of you are having that thought of "Was this foul play?" Could Miss Amber be getting attacked by someone in the store? Now, now you crazy kids Twitch loves me. No really we totally get along!

He does like the spotlight....

And even through all of this I am still the sweet, coffee addicted, heel loving , girl that you all know! I mean come on people I am so worried that this was a sign that I actually did a mental tally on whether or not I have been sending up my thanks, and praise for all that the Lord has blessed me with. This brought me to the bucket list of thanks. I recommend that you all take a moment each day to send up one blessing that he has given to you. And leave a comment on your blessing from today for us all to see!
I will start: I was blessed with my wonderful family.
disclaimer: no crosses, or miss amber's were injured in this incident.

Rack's and Pacer's

Anyone who works with the public is bound to have those day's where you really start to wonder why there is not a camera taping this for YouTube! Cereal Shoes!

Now Twitch was not here in the store today to help me and believe me I sooooo needed that little happy distraction to aid in the taming of the craziest Pacer EVER!!! What is a Pacer Miss Amber? Gather around and let Miss Amber explain.

 All woman will tell you there are two types of husbands when shopping : The Rack's and the Pacer's. The Rack's are like handy little helpers that hold your coat, purse, and any item that you may need to re-try on just to make sure it looks good. The Racks are sweet , quiet , and very very supportive. (No lie ladies one special Rack is one of the biggest cheerleader's for his wife I have ever seen!).

Then there are the Pacer's oh the Pacer's these poor tortured souls that display such pain and agony while their wife is  shopping that one almost feels the need to keep the phone handy in case this poor Pacer goes postal! Unlike the Racks, the Pacer's are not sweet, supportive, or even willing to aid in the holding of anything!

 Girl's you know, you have seen them by the dressing rooms, pacing back and forth like a lion in a zoo, making such observations as the dislike of EVERY item that they see on their significant other. They gasp at the idea of trying things on, and will nearly pass out when the gal wants to try on boots too.

But ladies the entertainment factor of watching a Pacer in action is that of watching the finally of your favorite t.v. show with out commercials! I swear to you every time I get a Pacer in the store I try my dangest not to stare! Oh, but it is far to interesting to take your eye's off of the situation!

Today was a SUPREME Pacer day!!! Oh ladies the Pacer of all time came in today and I have given him the title of Supreme Pacer Ala King!!!! Girls I couldn't take my eyes off of this guy. From the gasping over the idea of her trying on clothes, to the full on tantrum that is only comparable to a 2 year old with out a nap and on an iv of Mountain Dew! This was the moment in which I swear to you if I didn't think that he would pounce me like a Mountain Lion at the suggestion of me taping him for YouTube I soooo would of asked!

No lie he almost fell to the floor when she went to get a different size of shirt! It got to be almost a sport for me to see what next would set off the Supreme Pacer Ala King! Now of course I was humane to him I even offered him a chair to which I might add he replied " If I sit we will be here FOREVER!" the best part of his reaction was the whine in his tone and the way he placed his hand on his forehead like he was acting out a scene from Gone With the Wind! 

The wife was a gem of a girl and you could see that by the fourth shirt and second pair of jeans she too was my comrade in the game of Don't Break the Ice but in the Pacer form! He would whine, she would grab a dress, he would gasp and I would hand her a pair of jeans, he would stalk back and forth on Ferdinand and she would ask for a pair of size 8 boots!

By the end I believe she was the victor due to the fact that when she finally settled on a wrap he almost went through the door he was so excited! She smiled thanked me for the help, I smiled and thanked her for the purchase ( and thanked her in my head for the entertainment!)

This has got to become a reality show somewhere! I mean you can almost see the previews for it on TLC now! The material for this show would never be boring, or the same and you can guarantee that it would be a hit!  I kid you not once you have seen a Pacer in action you are going to always appreciate the Racks, but crave the entertainment of the Pacer's that walk in the store!

(disclaimer : No Pacer's were harmed during this shopping experience)